We Are the Youth

I stumbled upon this site when it was featured in an article on Beautiful/Decay, a web publication that covers ground breaking, cutting edge art that began as a 'zine in 1996. Beautiful/ Decay publishes a number of very interesting, thought-provoking (and sometimes provocative) posts that highlight art and projects that often push our boundaries and comfort levels. There were so many articles and art projects that I wanted to highlight here, but We Are the Youth felt most appropriate. I think that it is such an important project and that more people should be aware that these stories are out there and accessible.

We Are the Youth is an on-going project that has been featured in various galleries and media. It is based out of the United States. It combines the stories and portraits of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer youth in order to paint a picture of their experiences. Although I haven't had a chance to read every story, I have made my way through a great number of them. I have really enjoyed reading the stories shared by these youth. I appreciate the diversity of experiences and the optimistic message that the majority of them send. They do not all paint the picture-perfect coming out story filled with love and support from everyone, but they do suggest that coming to terms with one's identity and learning to accept oneself is a liberating experience.

What stood out to me was the diversity of backgrounds that these youth come from and the similarity in the underlying tone of their stories. All the stories I read spoke about the struggles that these youth faced in coming out not only their families, friends and communities, but also themselves. A running theme that emerged was the challenges that individuals faced when grappling with an identity that didn't "fit the norm." These stories highlight how the heteronormative ideal remains dominant in our society. These youth struggled with coming to terms with their sexuality because society has told them that anything that doesn't belong to the world of heterosexual, monogamous, gendered relationships defies the norm and is not as "natural." It is so incredibly important to begin steering our thinking away from this.

We have been speaking a lot about sex, gender expression, gender identity, and sexuality as a spectrum and this is clearly reflected in the stories of the youth. Some of the stories express that individuals are still searching for a place between the binaries that fully encompasses and defines the way they feel. I would take this a step further and encourage that we view the spectrum as constantly in flux; where we belong one day can change the next. Sexuality does not need to be a strictly defined and static category of our identity - it can (and should be) fluid. I want to draw on Judith Butler here again in emphasizing that gender (and sexuality) is a performance. Butler suggests that if we remove the idea of gender as a dichotomy from the equation, then the ideas about same-sex and opposite-sex become irrelevant. In the case of these youth, it is clear that if we followed Butler's advice, we could create a much more open space for them to explore and express their sexuality. 

Ban Bossy

"PUSHY, STUBBORN, BOSSY"

These words are thrown out by a number of familiar faces at the start of this video in the recent campaign to #BanBossy. This video caught my attention because of the unique mix of public figures presented. I really appreciated that there was a myriad of really great role models, from celebrities to politicians to organizational leaders, represented in the video. It shows strong, powerful women standing up for young girls and urging us to think about the implications of our words. I think that showing these women as a means to deliver their message is an excellent tool. As Judith Butler notes, gender is an imitation of an imitation, and there is no right way to perform. Imitating these women encourages young girls to be strong. 

As I mentioned in the previous post, words carry a lot of meaning and our understanding of words is a social construction. The negative connotation attached to words such as pushy, stubborn and bossy discourage girls from raising their voices. The #BanBossy campaign is designed to encourage girls to lead and not shy away from leadership positions. It highlights the fact that girls are labelled (especially using the term "bossy") when they assert themselves while a boy doing the same would be encouraged and deemed a "leader." This labeling of children that starts at a young age serves to reinforce the gender stereotypes that exist in our society today. It forces children to view themselves and their actions in terms of what is considered gender appropriate behaviour. 

Labeling children based on their personalities suggests a lot about how their gender and sexuality should be expressed. When young children are deemed certain qualities or characteristics based on their actions, they are likely going to react to and reflect these.  The underlying message each time a young girl is called bossy is that they should be passive, gentle, and submissive if they want to be considered feminine. On the contrary, boys are encouraged to be aggressive, speak their minds and take charge in order to exhibit their masculinity. These idealized genders are a social construction and we need to begin deconstructing them and looking at where power is situated in order to make a change. Gender is only what we construct it to be and if society can begin to acknowledge the power that adults and their words have on children, we can begin shifting these dated ideals of gender. Learn more about #BanBossy here. 

HeForShe - Gendered Language

I recently listened to Emma Watson's speech for the newly launched campaign by UN Women called HeForShe. She was eloquent and brought up many points that were important and powerful. This new campaign is about involving everyone, regardless of gender, in ending gender inequality. In particular, it calls out to men and boys to step up and advocate for change. Watson urges us to embrace feminism for what it is defined as - "the belief that men and women should have equal rights and opportunities; political, economic and social equality of the sexes." She argues that we have steered off course and grown apprehensive of the term and associated too many negative connotations with it.

Watson continues on with examples of how both boys and girls, women and men are faced with inequalities associated with the gender norms that are socially constructed. She speaks on the notion that both men and women are imprisoned by gender stereotypes and that in order to evoke change, everyone must feel their voice welcomed in the conversation. What really stood out to me was the point near the end of the speech that encourages us to think about "gender on a spectrum as opposed to two sets of opposing ideals." This jumped out to me because it seems to be contradicted in the naming of the campaign itself.

I agree with the points that Watson makes and definitely think that they are important and valuable. They urge individuals to begin thinking about feminism and gender equality in a more positive light, and to acknowledge the negative affects of gender roles and stereotypes on all individuals. The campaign is great in that it bases itself in the idea that gender equality is a part of basic human rights and needs to be taken seriously and given more attention, especially in many modern societies that claim to exhibit this trait (but in reality, is far from achieving true equality).

The only issue that I have with the campaign is the naming of it. Language is a powerful tool and by naming this campaign HeForShe, it forces people back into a binary. It suggests that gender is dichotomous and that individuals identify as either a man or a woman. Going back to the ideal of gender as a spectrum, I think that that use of clearly gendered pronouns in this campaign isolates those who do not fit neatly into one of the two categories. Instead of inviting everyone into the conversation, which is the intention voiced, it places emphasis on the seemingly clear and definitive line that is drawn between the genders. In a way, this discredits the grey area that surrounds issues of sex, gender, and sexuality. Despite its good intentions, I think that the campaign needs to be rethought with gender as a spectrum at the forefront of the movement in order to invite and accept all voices. Although I critique the language chosen to spearhead this campaign, I would still encourage everyone to learn more about it and support the cause! Learn more by visiting the HeForShe website here. 

Gender Failure: A Multimedia Performance

This video shows a portion of the multimedia performance by Rae Spoon and Ivan Coyote about their experiences in attempting to generate an understanding of the self while navigating the gender binary. Both artists self-identify as trans and challenge the traditional notions of male and female through spoken word, music and video performances. I had the privilege of meeting these two amazing individuals and seeing them perform in Vancouver earlier this year as a part of the Verses Festival and was completely blown away; every aspect of the show contributed to opening a dialogue that was at once challenging and thought-provoking. I felt that the performance was moving and inspiring. It definitely brings intersectionality into the conversation about the construction of gender and gender binaries, challenging (almost desperate) need individuals have to compartmentalize every aspect of our identity.

The show starts with Rae Spoon describing the experience of constantly being bombarded with questions by people trying to determine gender through the narrow understanding that one can only be a man or a woman. Even in identifying as a man, it soon became clear that the slightest ambiguity still caused unease for others. This is when Rae Spoon decided to "retire from the gender binary." I loved this notion that an individual can remove themselves from such a deeply embedded cultural understanding of gender. I love that this conversation challenges how we understand the gender as a binary and encourages us to think of alternatives that don't necessarily fit the mould. Ivan Coyote furthers this discussion by stating that the "English language is sadly devoid of names for people like me." This acknowledges the power of words and the meanings that we assign to them in the construction of identity. Whether we like it or not, the words we use, and the words that others choose to assign to us have a huge impact on how we come to see ourselves.

Part of the performance addresses the fact that almost every public place we engage in contains gendered washrooms, which, for Ivan Coyote, are a site that pitches safety against comfort. The fact that gendered washrooms are a public phenomenon (because we don't ever see these in a home) highlights how gender is socially constructed and cannot be understood without addressing the cultural context within which it is situated. The division between men and women is a deeply social one which is perpetuated in the gender divisions that we see in our public spaces. During their performance in Vancouver, one of the important items on our to-do list as volunteers preparing the venue was to print signs that covered the gendered signs on the washrooms to state that all of them were gender-neutral spaces. It was a small and simple act that served to demonstrate that we were conscious of the message that the performance was sending. Although it did not change the way the venue was run following this event, at least for the evening, it created a space in which people thought more carefully about the divide and why it exists. 

New Marketing Strategy: Viagra Ad Features Woman

On Tuesday, Viagra released their newest 60-second commercial. The new marketing campaign has stirred up quite a bit of attention as it features a woman addressing the issue of erectile dysfunction (ED) for the first time, encouraging men to seek advice from their doctors. Although many articles are addressing this change in tone and medium as a strategical move to widen the scope of its audience and boost sales, the underlying message that the commercial is sending is important. This commercial is groundbreaking and unique in that it takes on the issue of ED while highlighting its effect on women.

Sex-positive feminists would celebrate the fact that this ad suggests that sexual pleasure is equally as important for men and women. ED does not only result in embarrassment and a less fulfilling experience for men, but also dissatisfaction for women. In Julie Richters' article "Orgasm," she writes that "more sexually liberated cultures assume that women take at least as much pleasure in sex as men" (Siedman et al, 2011: 101). This highlights the sexual freedom encourage by sex-positive feminism. Featuring a woman in the commercial suggests that sexual pleasure and satisfaction for women is a topic that should be on the table, even in the discussion of a male-centered issue. However, the content of the commercial is still directed towards men; the woman speaks encouraging words that reassures her male audience that they are not alone, and that the problem can be easily solved with the purchase of the product.

Despite the sex-positive message the commercial is sending, we must not lose sight of how sexuality is being exploited in Viagra's latest endeavour. Although sexually charged images of women have become the norm in advertising and media, it is important to note that the commercialization and commodification of sex is a result of the sexual revolution. It this ad, a woman is pictured on the beach, at first lounging, then strolling around what appears to be a beach resort with her dress and her hair blowing in the wind. The fact that she is Caucasian, (implicitly) heterosexual and conventionally beautiful cannot be ignored; she fulfills the criteria for what is deemed to be "normal" or "acceptable" sexuality. In attempting to normalize ED and encouraging men to accept the situation and seek help, they are reinforcing the traditional scripts that we have come to understand. We may picture the partner of this woman to also be conventionally good-looking, happy, healthy and stable, generating an image for men that offers that successful and "normal" individuals can experience ED.

Consent: A Fresh Perspective

I read this article a few days ago and found myself nodding along and thinking YES the whole time. Harris O'Malley provides such a fresh and interesting perspective on the topic of consent and challenges one of the major aspects on which "rape culture" is built - saying no. I liked the fact that the article focused on steering consent in the direction of a definitive yes as opposed to not saying no. This definitely got me thinking about Lisa K. Waldner's article "Sexual politics in intimate relationships: Sexual coercion and harassment" in which she defines sexual coercion and attempts to make the boundaries of what is and is not considered harassment more clear. Walder defines sexual coercion as "whenever one partner pressures or forces the other to engage in any sexual behavior, ranging from kissing to various types of intercourse (oral, anal, vaginal)" (51). Rape is generally thought of as being on one extreme of the continuum of behaviours and is the most widely discussed in media. However, I think O'Malley's take on gaining a "YES!" in terms of consent should be applied to all forms of sexual behaviour and can be a good perspective to take when understanding harassment.

One point that stood out to me in O'Malley's article was the ideas that "consent isn't a binary decision - it's not all or nothing, always on or always off." I think this ties in well with the pluralist view of sexuality which builds off of the fact that sexual diversity exists and that absolute values cannot be placed on issues regarding sexuality. Additionally, sexual pluralism encourages pleasure and personal autonomy. This idea of attaining pleasure while still maintaining personal autonomy can be linked to the idea that consent is not a binary. Individuals may choose to engage in one act (that some may deem suggestive) that they find pleasurable without wanting to further that, thus exerting their capacity to make decisions. This does not make the first suggestive act wrong and furthermore it does not imply consent because how we choose to behave does not fit perfectly into a binary.

I realize that the unequal division of emphasis in this article reflects a majority of the discussions that have a foothold in mainstream media today. However, an issue that I find with O'Malley's arguments is the fact that it is heavily focused on women. The article talks mainly about men as aggressors and women as victims when it comes to the issue of assault. I feel that this negates the fact that a lot of men find themselves in similar situations and also struggle with understanding whether or not their experiences constitute rape. The dialogue about definitive, enthusiastic consent and clear, open lines of communication can (and should) go both ways. That said, I appreciate the attempt that is made here to begin to eliminate the ambiguity that often surrounds whether or not there was consent in cases of rape. It's a worthwhile read that offers that while sexuality is a diverse and wide-ranging matter, the decisions we make regarding our bodies should be clear and respected regarding of the underlying implications that others may have interpreted. 

Any Day Now

"It's the oldest story in the book. Boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy kicks open the closet door and finally, meets Mr. Right"

I watched the film Any Day Now a few months back and found it incredibly beautiful, moving, and raw. Based on a true story, the film is set in the 1970's and chronicles a homosexual couple's journey as they fight a biased legal system for custody of a young boy with Down Syndrome who has been abandoned by his mother. I found myself frustrated throughout the film about the injustices faced by the couple, who had to hide their relationship and feign "normality" in order to better their chances of adopting this child. It really brought to light that although situated within what is considered the sexual revolution, a lot of stigma still surrounded any forms of sexuality that deviated from the heterosexual, monogamous arrangement deemed conventional.

It is important to note that the two male characters in the film represent very different aspects of the sexual revolution. Rudy Donatello works as a drag performer and embraces his homosexual identity while Paul Fliger works as a lawyer and buries that part of his identity. Rudy embodies the gay rights movement, freedom of expression and homosexuality as an identity. Paul on the other hand is caught within a system that discourages (and threatens) his sexuality; identifying as a gay man and publicly acknowledging his relationship with Rudy would ruin his career. Although Rudy does not agree with this system, he accepts that this is the case and fabricates a series of lies with Paul to justify their relationship. This web of stories and false identities becomes even more important when they begin their battle for custody of Marco.

The film brought to mind the notion of double standards. We often apply this term to the incongruities in the treatment of sexuality between men and women, but it can also be applied to heterosexual and homosexual identities. Heterosexuality as a norm has been socially constructed within our society and although much progress has been made in terms of increased rights and equality for the LGBTQ community, heterosexuality is still accepted as the dominant orientation. In Any Day Now, Rudy and Paul are forced to hide their relationship (pretending instead to be relatives) in order to receive equal treatment under the law. Despite the fact that the legal system is supposed to be without biases, it is impossible to remove the deeply embedded understandings of what is right and wrong in terms of sexuality from those making the decisions. Had Rudy and Paul been a "normal", heterosexual couple, the would have been granted custody without any hesitation.

Despite feeling a myriad of emotions ranging from frustration to anger to hopelessness while watching this film, I continually recommend it to others. This is because I believe that the message it sends is an important one and that these struggles faced by individuals solely due to their sexuality need to be acknowledged, addressed, and changed. Any Day Now is important because it shows how far we have come as a society in terms of opening up to varying sexualities. It is important because it emphasizes that it wasn't long ago that such grave injustices and biases existed. It is important because it reminds us that they still exist, and that the struggles faced by Rudy and Paul are still real and relevant today.